Funny and odd things found on a journey through the internet.

12th October 2014

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12th October 2014

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nice handlebar mustache

nice handlebar mustache

Tagged: dr seussbikingmustache

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12th October 2014

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Tagged: whups

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12th October 2014

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Tagged: texas

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12th October 2014

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1st September 2014

Post with 1 note

22 Aphorisms




  1. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
  2. Deja Moo: The feeling that you’ve heard this bull before.
  3. The 2 most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.
  4. Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.
  5. If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.
  6. Vital papers will demonstrate their vitality by moving from where you left them to where you can’t find them.
  7. Always remember to pillage BEFORE you burn.
  8. The trouble with doing something right the first time is that nobody appreciates how difficult it was.
  9. It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
  10. Eagles may soar, but weasels aren’t sucked into jet engines.
  11. If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
  12. Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it.
  13. For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.
  14. Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view.
  15. To succeed in politics, it is often necessary to rise above your principles.
  16. Two wrongs are only the beginning.
  17. The sooner you fall behind, the more time you’ll have to catch up.
  18. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
  19. If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you’ve never tried before.
  20. Change is inevitable….except from vending machines.
  21. Don’t sweat petty things….or pet sweaty things.
  22. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.

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1st September 2014

Photo with 1 note

Tagged: stolentoilets

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1st September 2014

Photo reblogged from Welcome to the Island of Misfit Toys with 350,740 notes

syntheticmomma:

lupusadlunam:

thechangelingmedusa:
Like seriously, why isn’t pole dancing an olympic sport? This is freakin gymnastics. This is strength and skill. This is not sexual whatsoever. Why does pole dancing have to be so stigmatised as a sexual thing that only strippers do? I have great respect for all people who can pull this off. This is art and beauty right here. 

HEY FUN FACT: pole dancing is known as something strippers do because strippers invented it. And that’s okay! It’s okay to have respect for strippers and the hard work they put into what they do! Let’s stop trying to take the stripper part out of pole dancing so upperclass white girls can do it without being ~stigmatized~ because god forbid women be sexual.


And, what happens with a little cooking oil on the pole?

syntheticmomma:

lupusadlunam:

thechangelingmedusa:

Like seriously, why isn’t pole dancing an olympic sport? This is freakin gymnastics. This is strength and skill. This is not sexual whatsoever. Why does pole dancing have to be so stigmatised as a sexual thing that only strippers do? I have great respect for all people who can pull this off. This is art and beauty right here. 

HEY FUN FACT: pole dancing is known as something strippers do because strippers invented it. And that’s okay! It’s okay to have respect for strippers and the hard work they put into what they do! Let’s stop trying to take the stripper part out of pole dancing so upperclass white girls can do it without being ~stigmatized~ because god forbid women be sexual.

And, what happens with a little cooking oil on the pole?

Tagged: pole dancing

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Source: youtube.com

9th August 2014

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US Air 2771

While taxiing at London’s Gatwick Airport, the crew of a US Air flight departing for Ft. Lauderdale made a wrong turn and came nose to nose with a United 727.
An irate female ground controller lashed out at the US Air crew, screaming: “US Air 2771, where the hell are you going?! I told you to turn right onto Charlie taxiway! You turned right on Delta! Stop right there. I know it’s difficult for you to tell the difference between C and D, but get it right!”
Continuing her rage to the embarrassed crew, she was now shouting hysterically: “God! Now you’ve screwed everything up! It’ll take forever to sort this out! You stay right there and don’t move till I tell you to! You can expect progressive taxi instructions in about half an hour, and I want you to go exactly where I tell you, when I tell you, and how I tell you! You got that, US Air 2771?”
“Yes, ma’am,” the humbled crew responded.
Naturally, the ground control communications frequency fell terribly silent after the verbal bashing of US Air 2771. Nobody wanted to chance engaging the irate ground controller in her current state of mind. Tension in every cockpit out around Gatwick was definitely running high.

Just then an unknown pilot broke the silence and keyed his microphone, asking: “Wasn’t I married to you once?

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9th August 2014

Quote with 1 note

The German air controllers at Frankfurt Airport are renowned as a short-tempered lot. They not only expect one to know one’s gate parking location, but how to get there without any assistance from them. So it was with some amusement that we (a Pan Am 747) listened to the following exchange between Frankfurt ground control and a British Airways 747, call sign Speedbird 206.
Speedbird 206: “Frankfurt, Speedbird 206 clear of active runway.”
Ground: “Speedbird 206. Taxi to gate Alpha One-Seven.”
The BA 747 pulled onto the main taxiway and slowed to a stop.
Ground: “Speedbird, do you not know where you are going?”
Speedbird 206: “Stand by, Ground, I’m looking up our gate location now.”
Ground (with quite arrogant impatience): “Speedbird 206, have you not been to Frankfurt before?”
Speedbird 206 (coolly): “Yes, twice in 1944, but it was dark, — And I didn’t land.”

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9th August 2014

Quote

Tower:”Eastern 702, cleared for takeoff, contact Departure on frequency 124.7”
Eastern 702: “Tower, Eastern 702 switching to Departure. By the way,after we lifted off we saw some kind of dead animal on the far end of the runway.”
Tower:”Continental 635, cleared for takeoff behind Eastern 702, contact Departure on frequency 124.7. ! Did you copy that report from Eastern 702?”
BR Continental 635: “Continental 635, cleared for takeoff, roger; and yes, we copied Eastern… we’ve already notified our caterers.”

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9th August 2014

Quote with 1 note

A DC-10 had come in a little hot and thus had an exceedingly long roll out after touching down.
San Jose Tower Noted: “American 751, make a hard right turn at the end of the runway, if you are able. If you are not able, take the Guadeloupe exit off
Highway 101, make a right at the lights and return to the airport.”

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9th August 2014

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O’Hare Approach Control to a 747: “United 329 heavy, your traffic is a Fokker, one o’clock, three miles, Eastbound.”
United 329: “Approach, I’ve always wanted to say this…I’ve got the little Fokker in sight.”

Tagged: O'HareFokker

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9th August 2014

Quote

From an unknown aircraft waiting in a very long takeoff queue: “I’m f…ing bored!”
Ground Traffic Control: “Last aircraft transmitting, identify yourself immediately!”
Unknown aircraft: “I said I was f…ing bored, not f…ing stupid!”

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9th August 2014

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Tower:”TWA 2341, for noise abatement turn right 45 Degrees.”
TWA 2341: “Center, we are at 35,000 feet. How much noise can we make up here?”
Tower:”Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a 727?”

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